My Introduction to Parenthood in the Quest for Sleep

I guess I thought the "give-them-whatever-they-want" stage of parenthood would last a little longer. Evan is seven months old and then some and it seems that just in the last month or so I feel like I've had to become a real parent. Before it was more like playing dolls. The baby would cry and I would take care of him. He would stop crying. We would all be happy. The end. No life lessons to teach, no hard knocks, just simple need fulfillment all day and all night. *All* night.

For months I told myself that "he's only little like this for such a short time" and "night nursing is a special time for us to be together" to get through nights with 2 or 3 wakings but these platitudes didn't help when it was 7 or 8 wakings a night. I do enjoy being with Evan at night and I don't want to night wean him yet but a couple 4+ hour stretches of sleep would be nice. We were getting desperate...sleep deprived, on the edge of sickness, frustrated we started trying things. Bed time routines, better naps, motrin, mylicon, singing, massage and finally, with much resignation, crying.

For the first time in my parenting life I had to be the "adult" and trust myself that I know what is best for my child and that it might not be the same as what he wants. Russ and I decided it was good practice for when he protests our refusal to buy him the Playstation 7 when it comes out someday.

I'm glad to report that it didn't take that much crying and it gets less and less with every nap and bed time. I must admit that it is a valuable parenting skill to be able to let your baby cry for a few minutes. Torturous but valuable. I'm not saying I "believe" in the cry it out method. I want to calm his crying with every ounce of my being. But I do believe that every baby has to learn to fall asleep and stay asleep on their own and that there is a myriad of ways to learn this. Evan's way just happened to involve a bit of crying.

P.S.

Last night Evan only woke twice between 7 pm and 7 am. We are having success. Also, a very timely article from the NYTimes on the topic is very interesting and encouraging.